Case
My Son's Teacher

I have a 3 year old son in Pre-K. When I first enrolled him in this school everything seemed fined. He liked his teacher and started gaining a lot of friends. One day while I was visiting his class I noticed that his teacher was ignoring a white student sitting in the back of the classroom. I didn't say anything because I assumed he was in time out. As time passed she kept ignoring him. Whenever he wanted to participate with the class she just smiled and said nothing. Story time she made him sit in the back. He's already the only white male in the class, there's a female but she treats her the same. I'm not sure why she treats him like this but I know this isn't right. I don't want to cause any problems but I cannot sit back and continue to let her treat that innocent boy that way. What can I do to help him?

Posted on: 12/08/12 | Views: 2328
Solution #1
Top Solution
As a first grade teachers, I would first ask my three year old why that child is by themself. Most of the time, they know! If he doesnt know, I would talk to her supervisor and discuss why you are concerned. Explain to them that you wouldn't want your child to be treated this way, and that you are concerned for that child's well being. I dont think her supervisor would like what she is doing. THis way, if there is a reason, the supervisor would know and explain to you that there is a reason but can not talk to you about it because of confidentiality. At least you would know that there is a legitamite reason.

I agree that it is a good idea to say something to the administration. If you honestly feel like there is an issue, it will do no harm to at least mention your concerns.

I like the suggestion to ask the child first. You are correct that most of the time, they truly do know what they did wrong! If it is the teacher being overly rude to the child, that will enable you to find out about the situation without stepping on her toes.

I also agree on notifying administration!

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Solution #2
As a parent, I feel like I have the right to know what is going on in my child's classroom. I would try my best not to jump to conclusions. However, in my opinion, you would be completely justified to ask the teacher about the situation. If the student is being punished, the punishment should not last this long, especially for a 3 year old. Just because this isn't your child, doesn't mean it's not your business. This is someone's child. Regardless of what he may have done, every child should start fresh every day. If this is going on for more than one day, I would ask the teacher privately to explain the situation. If this is a form of punishment, you have the right to know because it could be your child next.

I think that parents have a right to understand a teacher's classroom management or discipline strategies and that asking the teacher would be alright. I also agree that the parent should not jump to conclusion because they do not know exactly what the situation might be and if that student's parents are aware of what is happening.

I agree with this solution. If the teacher does not explain the reasoning for the isolation of the child I would then see her supervisor.

I agree with this

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Solution #3
As a parent, he/she may feel like they do not have the authority to question the teacher on this situation however something should be said in a professional manner. The parent could ask the teacher in private to have a one-on-one meeting. The parent could nicely discuss her concern with the teacher and why this is happening. In some cases, the teacher may not know that they are neglecting the student. If this is the case then the teacher should become more aware of the student by encouraging his participation in class and acknowledging him as he/she does any other student. If the case is more serious and the teacher is just showing bias towards certain students for personal reasons then something should be done immediately. The parent may need to contact other school administrators to address this conflict if the teacher-parent meeting does not solve anything.
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Solution #4
I do agree with you that it isn't right for a teacher to ignore the student and always shunning him, especially when he wants to participate. I think you should talk to the principle on what you have observed in the classroom, so he/she can observe and solve the problem. I don't think you should talk to the teacher personally because that may cause some problems for you and your son. You did the right thing by not saying anything, but you should bring this issue to the principle so they can handle it.
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Solution #5
I agree with you that this teachers' behavior towards the child is wrong. One can not know the teacher's motives until you ask her so before assuming anything, I'd ask the teacher what her/his motives are. I know that if that was my child I would want to know if he/she was being isolated from the class so another form of action would be to notify the child's parents or guardians of what you have seen and have them handle the situation as they see fit. You stated that the child is the only white male in the class so you could suggest that the teacher highlight his differences and use that as a teaching tool for his classmates. While the white boy is different from his classmates they still share similarities so, his classmates can also be utilized as a teaching tool for him. This will make the class more unified as one and everyone will play a part.
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Solution #6
I don't agree with this treatment! I would have to go to administration about this situation and make sure they looked into it. I wouldn't go directly to the teacher because I wouldnt want to cause trouble for my son. All students should be treated the same no matter race or ethnic background.

Something to consider.

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Solution #7
I think that the first thing you should do is contact the teacher. Request a meeting with the teacher and start off talking about your son. I think that it will be best to ease into the subject and gain the teacher's respect first. Then I would calmly ask about what you observed in the classroom and ask her why she is doing this. If she answers with a reasonable answer don't press the matter any further unless nothing changes. If she does not give a reasonable answer I would try and talk to her and let her know you are uncomfortable with the situation. I would ask her to please include all the children in activities because if it was her son she would be very unhappy with the treatment she was giving the child. If the teacher still refuses to chnage her ways then I would go talk to someone with higher authority over the teacher. It is not right to discrimmante against a child in the classroom because of any reason.
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Solution #8
It is against the law to discriminate against anyone for any reason. I would approach the situation in the calmest manner possible. You do not want to offend the teacher or assume that she is purposefully disciminating against the child. I would question her reasoning to understand what is going on first. If the reasoning seems legitimate, explain that it doesn't appropriate from your perspective. I would continue to observe to see if anything changes. If the child continues to be treated the same way I would take it up with higher authority. This way the you have a support system rather than approaching the situation any further by yourself. There are some teachers that do not treat their students this way on purpose. However, there are some situations where there is more information to the story than what can be seen from the outside looking in.
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Solution #9
I have worked in a very popular daycare before and 99% of the time there is a director at the site that is supposed to be running the entire site as well as making sure everything is going smoothly. I would pull the director off to the side when I was picking up the child and express your concerns to her or him. That is what they are there for. I would not go directly to the teacher. It would cause things to be incredible awkward and could possibly make the teacher start treating your child differently. It is the director's job to then take care of the situation and/or teacher. The director could talk to the teacher and find out what is happening without mentioning what child's parent came to him or her. If the director does not do anything or you do not see any difference in the class, then I would suggest going over the director's head to whomever her/his boss is or whoever runs the daycare program.
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Solution #10
Although bullying among teachers is not common, it does take place. There should be a meeting set up among the parent and teacher to discuss the teachers behavior. School officials should be contacted and a meeting should be with school officials and at the Board of Education. The parent should educate themselves on the schools disciplinary procedures for students and staff. The behavior should be requested to be investigated. The student should be removed from the class immediately.
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Solution #11
Teachers should never ignore students and inhibit their opportunities for learning. There may be a special circumstance with this boy, though, that you are unaware of. Maybe he is constantly disrespectful to the teacher, and she is trying to stop this by not provoking the behavior by calling on him in class. Wanting to be a teacher myself, I would assume that she loves children and would never purposefully do anything to target this student. Unfortunately, though, some teachers may not be as loving towards student as I would hope they would be. I wouldn't involve yourself in the situation yet, but maybe talk to your own child and ask about how this student is treated in the classroom.
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Solution #12
I would say first talk to the teacher, and express your concerns. In the meantime, if you notice things do not change, then I would advise to go to the supervisor. It may not be a racial thing, but perhaps a behavior management tactic. It also could be that the parents want him in the back for whatever reason. If none of that is the case though, something needs to be done so this student can succeed in the classroom. If none of that helps, maybe you could spend some time in the classroom since it is such young grades, you could even involve him yourself. Or while you are dropping your son off, if you see his parents maybe make some small talk about the student.
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Solution #13
I would first talk to the teacher and ask her why she is isolating the child. If the teacher does not give a reasonable answer,I would then talk to the principal. No child should be left out especially when they are not doing anything wrong. Every child needs to be involved an engaged in a lesson.
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Solution #14
I know many classes with students that age have "class parents" that come to help the teacher with a variety of things. Maybe you could volunteer to be one of these mothers which would give you an opportunity to create a relationship with the students and teacher. Then, you could ask the teacher privately about what you have observed and see if you are able to offer any help or suggestions. I agree that you shouldn't jump to conclusions, but I completely understand how you may feel that you need to intervene.

I think it is a good idea to volunteer to be a room mom, however; I do not think addressing the teacher is a good idea. Being a room mom allows you to further observe the situation and give the child needed attention, but if the problem persists I feel it would be best to talk to the administration instead.

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Solution #15
There are many different possible explanations for the situation. I would ask the teacher why the child is being ignored, and I would also let her know that from an outsiders viewpoint it does look bad. Depending on the response of the teacher, I would take it to an administrator if I did suspect that there was something negative going on between the teacher and the student.

I would suggest my feelings to the teacher on this first. I would question her and see what her explanation is. If there is no cooperation or reasoning I would go further and talk to administration.

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Solution #16
The situation you describe sounds sad, yet I would proceed with caution. I wouldn't talk to the teacher, but bring up my concern to the administration. Speaking to the teacher seems as if your questioning her classroom management and might negatively be reflected upon your child. It has been my experience; the school administration is the individuals that can change the negative learning environment the quickest in a VPK classroom.
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Solution #17
As a parent and not a school official it could cause and issue. But I would ask the teacher when by her or him self if there was something wrong with the child sitting in the back and just say I notice that he was excluded from class activities. She may respond and at least she know that someone is paying attention, you wont to make sure thou that you are not assumming anything.
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Solution #18
I would ask the teacher the meaning behind these actions in way that does not directly accuse the teacher. This can be done by asking the teacher is that student in time out? Does that student pay attention better in the back during story time? The responses to these questions will determine what your next mode of action should be. If the teacher replies with anything that may lead you to believe she is being biased you then have the information to take this issue to the proper administration to deal with this situation.
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Solution #19
I think you should bring this up to the administration at the school. It is unethical for the teacher to be treating the students like this.
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Solution #20
It is sad that there are teachers out there that mistreat their students this way. It is not right at all. It doesn't matter if the child has a discipline problem or whatever the case may be. I am sorry you had to witness this. I would suggest writing to an administrator but doing it anonymously. Just for the sake of your sanity about how this teacher will mistreat your child.
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Solution #21
I agree that I would definitely address what you have noticed to the classroom teachers. This will hopefully give you a better insight into what that situation is with that child. If there is not a reasonable answer, I would try and further question the teacher about the problem or discuss this with an administrator. There is no reason to act this way towards children and especially ones who are so young.
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Solution #22
Get to know what you can do to help.
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Solution #23
I would mention this to the people in charge of the pre-k.
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Solution #24
I think I would ask the teacher privately about the situation in a light hearted manner. Just a simple, "whats his story" kind of a deal. This will give you more insight on the matter. Then, I would take steps from there. Maybe this student is a constant disruption? Maybe this student is simply victim to her segregation. If that is the case, I would bring it up to a higher power in the school as a concerned parent and relay your conversation to them as well.
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Solution #25
With this since you are a parent I would tell the principal and have them deal with this problem or have them sit in the class and see if she does it with them in the classroom. This is not something you should bring up to the teacher.
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Solution #26
Ask the child first, then the teacher. You could casually ask them how they are doing and why they are sitting back here all alone. If they don't know, ask the teacher. If it a ridiculous reason, contact administration.
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Solution #27
I would contact the administration about doing an observation in the classroom and maybe speaking with the student privately. The student may be young but can express whether or not he is having fun in class.
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Solution #28
I have encountered similar situations, and the path is always the same for me, advocate for that child. I know as a parent being on that side of things can be difficult but sometimes your the only one has seen in and therefore the only one who can say something about it.
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Solution #29
I think it is important to remember that there can be so many possible reasons as to why she treats this student this way. I do not think her behavior is okay, but you have to look at the many possibilities as to why she is ignoring the student. It could be because he may act out in the class which can cause a disruption during reading time. I think the best solution would be to maybe talk to the students parents about the situation. This way the parents can be in the loop because it could be that the student may have behavior problems that you do not know about. I would say talk the the students parents and let them handle it from their.
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Solution #30
I agree that this is wronf of the teacher, but you may never know what the 2 children may have done prior to the activity to be treated this way. The teacher may be using a process of exclusion. Ive heard that ignoring the kids makes them want to behave more. Maybe the 2 students have done something to cause the teacher to ignore them?
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Solution #31
I'm trying to be optimistic here, but maybe the child has upset the teacher in some way. Is there a chance that she's ignoring him because she feels like she doesn't want to waste all of her time on one problematic student, instead of simply because of his race? Let's hope so! Now, if you're in the classroom and hear her make comments about his race, that's another story!
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Solution #32
I would ask the teacher to step aside and talk with me about why she has him in the back of the classroom. Then I would bring the issue to the principle and ask her to address it with the teacher.
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