Case
Case Solved
Sexist Parent

I have a male student that works very well with the other boys in the classroom but when it comes to working with the girls he says a lot of sexist comments such as, "Why do you even try when you're just going to end up in the kitchen." I asked for a conference with the parents and found out that the father has been teaching him very sexist things. He continuously disrespected me and told me that what his son was saying is the truth in the end. His mother was not there and so I felt very uncomfortable and very mad that his father was treating me this way. I have tried contacting the mother to try and get her to come in but she constantly cancels on me and does not respond to any of my emails or notes. What should I do?

Posted on: 09/28/15 | Views: 1620
Solution #1
Top Solution
In this situation you should request another conference with both parents and have another teacher preferably male or an administrator to help with the conference. I think it will be beneficial for the father to hear you out with support from your teacher peers, but also that his son is not doing very well with participation and he needs to be able to respect other students in the classroom.

I found this solution very helpful.

Talking to both parents separately seems like a good solution.

Having an administrator there seems best.

This solution is good

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Solution #2
In this type of situation I would call for another conference and insist that both parents attend. Even if the mother cancels again make sure to have another teacher in the classroom this time. Preferably a male administrator, guidance consoler, or just even another male teacher. If this does not work for the parents then try and break the habit for the student. Move him down on the behavior chart after every sexist comment. Either way it sounds like it may take some time to get this issue to pass over.

I like the idea of having another teacher in the classroom during the conference.

That's a good idea, so that others can hear the things said.

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Solution #3
The fact that this student is belittling other is a non-negotiable in the classroom setting. After clearing this with your administration, I would notify the parents and the student that such comments are a type of prejudice and sexist comments. Therefor they are under the bullying umbrella. With this said, further disrespectful comments will be written up and disciplinary acts will be taken. Be clear on the boundaries of what an individual family believes and what is allowed in the public school setting.

I agree, there needs to be accountability for this student.

There definitely needs to be consequences.

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Solution #4
I think having both parents attend the conference is a great idea and having someone else sit in on the conference. Unfortunately it is impossible sometimes to change the beliefs of parents and the best way to deal with this is to talk to the student about that sometimes it is okay to say things at home that are not okay in a school setting because they hurt people's feelings. I would also maybe think about adding some famous females to your curriculum if at all possible to help teach the student that woman can make history and become great things.

An interesting and insightful solution.

That's a great idea to show respect and admiration for woman in the curriculum. The teacher has an opportunity to show the student a different perspective than what he sees at home.

I love the idea of adding famous women into areas of the curriculum. It may be too late to change the views of this student's father, but showing him examples of powerful and important women both in history and present could be very effective in changing the child's view on the topic. Although it is unsettling that he would have these viewpoints and make negative comments about women, if this is the mindset that he was raised around it would be hard to blame the child for such thoughts. Show him that what he has learned at home is not necessarily correct.

Adding famous females is brilliant!

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Solution #5
In this case I would call another parent teacher conference with both parents. I would also have in attendance the school resource officer and his guidance counselor to help explain to student and his parents that such behavior is not acceptable in the classroom.
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Solution #6
Obviously the students is getting it from somewhere, and my guess would be at home so a parent conference might not be the best solution, the father proved that point. As a teacher this situation is taking place in my classroom and I would make it my job to stop it. I would suggest doing an age appropriate unit on jobs that people do, male and female. And then pull the student aside and let him know that while he is in the walls of your classroom everyone will be treated equally or there will be consequences.
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Solution #7
Unfortunately women still do not have all the respect that they deserve and we still have sexist people out there, so it might help if a male teacher or administrator was present for the next conference. Hopefully you can have a conference with both parents

I agree! Having a male administrator is best.

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Solution #8
That is absolutely crazy! I would have a conference with the parents and an administrator, preferably male since the father is sexist and teaching his son his sexist ways. I would also try to correct the boy in class when he says those things or incorporate examples of influential women in whatever subject(s) you teach. It could be an everyday thing where you sit around together for 5 minutes to learn about a new person and the majority of them could be women and POC. Just a thought to try to subtly reverse this child's thoughts.
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Solution #9
Luckily enough the situation is not unsalvageable. He will need to relearn and that is not 100% on you, but do not try to take full responsibility given his father.
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Solution #10
This is a major issue that needs to be addressed with parents and tell them that attitude will not be allowed in your classroom.

I agree that the attitude should not be allowed.

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Solution #11
I would definitely talk to the guidance counselor and find out from them on what ways they would approach this situation in communicating both with the parents and the child.

I agree with going to someone else to help but I don't see how a guidance counselor could help.

a guidance counselor could find the root of the child's comments.

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Solution #12
I would immediately go to the guidance counselor. This is completely inappropriate and unacceptable.

I think that a guidance counselor could help in this case.

I think the first step is talking to the parents about son's behavior in the class.

I would not do this.This is wrong.

I think administrator would help more than a guidance counselor.

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