Case
The Over-involved Parent

The mother of one of the students in your third grade class left twenty-minute messages on his voice mail every day. Listening to them consumed your entire free period. She would also show up at your school unexpectedly. You would walk into your classroom and find her waiting to speak with you. What actions would you take in order to prevent this happening?

Posted on: 03/01/13 | Views: 1731
Solution #1
Top Solution
I would first schedule a meeting with the parent and give her the time to state all of her concerns in person. Giving the parent a chance to be able to freely discuss her concern can help bring down the constant phone calls. Then I would begin to discuss a way or system for her to communicate with me without completely overloading mine and her time. I would kindly stress that although I am pleased to see that she is so involved with her child's education, time is being taken away from planning and helping my students. If her main concerns are being with her child and making sure that they were okay, I would ask her to consider being an aid to help with making materials and contributing to her child's education that way.

I love this solution! After you discuss the issue at hand, you invite her to be an aid. By doing this it will make her feel needed and sometimes that is all the parent needs.

I'd also discuss scheduling meetings/appointments. Parents need to understand that it is inappropriate to show up unannounced and leave ridiculously long voice mails. I would go about this in a calm and professional manner as to not upset the parent or make them feel like I don't have time for them.

This would be the most appropriate way to handle this situation.

This is an great solution! i will definitely use this in my classroom.

This is a great solution. I think suggesting that the parent volunteer as a classroom aid would be a perfect way for her to be involved.

Talking to the parent about the issue would be ideal.

this is how i would handle the issue

I agree with you!

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Solution #2
I would gladly explain to her that I am pleased to see a parent so involved in the education of her child. I would explain how her child will benefit from her involvement, but from my experience, over-involvement will lead to difficulties between the student, parent, and teacher in the future. I would ask her to please let me know when she would like to come in and volunteer in my classroom and that I would be more than willing to have her present in my classroom. However, I would limit it to 1-2 days per week, or during special events. I would thank her for all her thoughts and suggestions, but would emphasize that I have a job to do, and that extra help can be a distraction.

I like this solution, but I would also document the days, and times that the parent becomes involved and show them proof.

I agree with this solution!

I agree with this solution!

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Solution #3
In my school, admin does not allow impromptu conferences with parents that have not been scheduled. Implementing this in the school would solve this problem. Keep data of how often you are responding to each message and present the data during a conference with the parent. Let her know that you are more than happy to respond to messages, but this often is disruptive to the school day.

I liked this solution the best out of all of the solutions. I would document everything.

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Solution #4
Start a journal with the parent to have daily contract instead of phone calls

Documentation is a great way to go about this!

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Solution #5
I would be honest with her and say that while I think it is great that she is so concerned about her child's progress I need her to not call me so much because it at some point starts to take away from others and her own students progress. I will attempt to make a meeting time with her where she can share all of her concerns in a well defined way.

I wouldn't tell a parent to not call so much. It might be honest but the parent could find it rude.

This is an great solution! i will definitely use this in my classroom.

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Solution #6
In order for the 'over-involved' parent to know their being over-involved is by telling him or her, of course in appropriate manner. You could send a note home to all students in regards to the parents. The letter could state your available hours of free time and when the best time is for the parent to contact you either through the school's classroom phones or by email. By sending each child home with a letter allows for all the parents to know your availability but most important to the parent that's the main problem.

This is not a great solution. The parent deserves for you to discuss your concerns with them. It seems very timid to me if you sent home a letter. Have the conversation, express your concerns and try to include them into the classroom when it would not be a distraction.

I kind of liked this answer. I feel like this letter should of been sent out within the first week of class.

This would be the most appropriate way to handle this situation.

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