Case
"My daughter sits with all boys?"

At the beginning of the school year I had my desks in groups of three to four. I had a parent email me and explain that her daughter felt bullied because she was a table with all boys. The table consisted of her daughter and two other boys. I tried to explain that the desks were in groups of three and one gender would out weigh the other. She did not seem to understand. What would you say to a parent if this happened to you?

Posted on: 03/09/15 | Views: 1200
Solution #1
Top Solution
I would first explain the significance of having a certain number of students to a group (e.g. more ideas than with only two students or possibly to prevent behavior issues in groups of four or more). If she still does not understand, I would be sure to advise her that their behavior is monitored, especially she has concerns about sexual harassment, etc. If she insists, suggest that you will make sure her daughter is grouped with at least one other girl.

I agree! I don't see it as an issue but if the parents would like to have her sit somewhere else then I'd just move them.

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Solution #2
I would simply just move the female away from that particular group and move another female that wouldn't mind being in a group with two other boys. Sometimes when it comes to parents, just like anything else, we mush choose our battles and that's not one that we should be willing to fight.

Yeah, I agree with this. Although diversity is good, if the parent is concerned and wants her moved then do it.

I agree! This isn't a big deal and should just be dealt with so you don't have to worry anymore.

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Solution #3
If the student is feeling this way then she is not learning what is needed. I would change the desk in this case because it could affect the students learning.

I agree! Asking the student how she feels is best to make sure that this is not just the parent's opinion.

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Solution #4
I would ask the parent to come in for a conference if possible or take a picture of how the desks are arranged and maybe email it to the parent. It is hard to please everyone. Parents don't realized how much is in a small classroom then add students and yourself and everyone is cramped.

I agree! You are not able to please everyone so helping them understand how things work is best.

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Solution #5
I would explain that you set up the class specifically so that students get different opinions and interactions from each other, and that by allowing the student to sit with others, regardless of gender, that you are allowing them better interactions with their peers. To solidify this reason I would make sure that the students rotated every so often and that the student is allowed to sit with other girls as well.
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Solution #6
This has happened to me personally. I teach middle school music/guitar. In my classes, it is obvious that I have to move students around based on ability level. I have had complaints because there was one boy sitting with all girls, or vice versa. I simply explain to parents that they are placed based on their ability and grade level during our performing ensembles. Gender plays absolutely no part in my decision to place students. Generally, as long as parents know you aren't singling their child out in an unfair situation, they are more open-minded.

Good view point!

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Solution #7
I would first explain the given ration of boys versus girls in the classroom. I would tell that I randomly picked the groups not by chose. I also would tell them that each quarter the students switch groups and that I can have her in a group with more girls next time if that makes them feel better.
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Solution #8
If the daughter is saying she feels bullied, you should immediately move the student, preferably to sit with at least one other girl.

Agreed! If the student says something then move the seats around.

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Solution #9
I would assure the parent that the setting arrangement would change frequently throughout the school year, so while the daughter may be outnumbered by boys now, there will come a time when she has other girls to sit with.

Great idea!

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Solution #10
I would explain the reasoning behind the grouping to the parents, and see if they still want the child moved.

I agree! if the parent wants them moved then just do it.

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Solution #11
I would explain to the parent that her assigned seat wont be forever and that they will be switching seats soon as a class.
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Solution #12
I would contact the parent and explain the reasoning for the specific grouping (ability levels, behavior, etc...). I group my students in groups of three and I typically put one of my higher level students in each group to be the "leader". If the female student in a high level student, explain that to the parent and she may change her mind if her daughter is a "leader".
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